I’ve begun something new in my life,

I’ve decided to add more value to it.

All aspects.

I want more, more laughs, more love, best friends, &  I couldn’t think of any better way to make that happen then to become closer to culture, religion.

The Islamic Society of Corona-Norco presented Mufti Asim Rasheed’s discussion on Handling Stress & Depression (According to the Quran) & I was lucky enough to be a member of that evening.

The discussion went into detail about how our belief system helps guide you in times of disbelief or doubt and here are just some things that I took from that evening;

The Quran has many remedies within it, in this sense it’s a cure for the weakness of ones Iman (one’s faith).

  • Our emotions are prone to interpretation – we as people create a judgement based off of our emotional being and act upon them.
  • To be in control of your mind & actions – know that we’re in control of our emotional states.
  • Make the decision to disempower the negative emotions – emotions are signals, understand what they are & use them to create a positive outcome.

I’ve always know that depression isn’t the same as sadness, but I learned that the defining elemental differences between them is that sorrow has a cause.

  • Depression is difficult to pinpoint, an overwhelming blanket that may be encompassing .

Imam Rasheed shared questions to ask yourself to distinguish whether you might be depressed or simply feeling sadness. Those were :

  1. Can you enjoy life? – With depression life can feel impossible. Doing everyday things you once enjoyed may not be enough to resurface you.
  2. Is there a specific reason you’re upset? Is the intensity at the appropriate degree? – For example, if your friend doesn’t answer a phone call & it throws you down an emotional whirlwind. There’s something not right there.  If there is not a pinpointed reason it may be depression.
  3. Are you sleeping, eating well? – Sleep is incredibly important. 6-7 hours, it surprisingly affects women mentally & physically more than men. Our bodies need to have certain vitamins &  minerals – because lacking essential nutrients can allow our bodies to deteriorate.
  4. Are you constantly criticizing yourself?Within depression, you stop believing in yourself & your abilities. Small mistakes are blown out of proportion.
  5. Lastly, have you ever considered harming yourself, or ending your life? – This is a huge sign for you to seek professional help. Ending your life is not the answer, there’s always help out there. Trust in that.

I think that the most important and interesting thing that I learned is that, the opposite of depression is not happiness.

Depression cannot be cured by giving things that make you happy because you are not quite ready to be happy.

The opposite of depression is VITALITY – the ability to live life to the fullest.

So then we asked what can we do to BOOST our mood?

  • Meditation within Salaat – By putting your mind on something healthy (such as God & his mightiness) & taking it off the worries  & detaching from material things we can achieve some inner peace.
  • Quran – When we contemplate the meanings, when we read words of the Holy book we are in the highest forms of reward, To my surprise hundreds of verses in the Quran are about consoling the Prophet in his times of need. So when we need help within ours, where else would we go?
  • Repetition here but sleep and eating habits are extremely important to monitor.
    • “When you realize that you’re being comforted by God, when you realize that the book is also created for you, that is a beautiful comfort.”
    • Imam Rasheed insisted that when you enforce a schedule within your lifestyle for your faith it’ll never be forgotten.

Sharing your worries with God, he becomes your friend. in this new relationship you’ll hope to find ease & contentment. Pulling yourself out of sadness & out of depression.

After the session on depression closed we had some time to think about what it all meant. Honestly in that moment it made so much sense to me, how simply it had been put. I have NEVER felt such clarity. So, I thank Imam Rasheed.

I felt refreshed.

& then we began the debate on Stress, which if you continue this journey with me was just as eye opening.

Stress is the worry of the problem,  aside from the problems at hand.

Daily stresses add up to what creates the worry we naturally run from; simple solutions may help with the preparation and intent of your day to day.

What this means is that – Routine alleviates avoidable stress! It allows you to create better habits for yourself. Multitasking should not be glorified, no one has ever done two things to the best of their ability at the same time. There will always be chaos and spontaneity in the world from time to time but when most can be planned you WILL have the time to deal with the chaos that ensues.

We quickly touched on sleep & the best way for your body to be stress free during it; the best night of sleep you can get should include:

  • at least 6 – 7 hours of it!
  • no lights, whatsoever
  • no sounds
  • & lastly, no electromagnetic waves

Our bodies have a frequency that it regulates on and electromagnetic waves disrupt the renewal or rejuvenation of said frequency that’s supposed to be happening during sleep! Anything electronic gives off these waves, so in return while you’re sleeping you shouldn’t have any of these devices on within 10 feet or you.

I  know, it sounds impossible. But there are always subtle adjustments to be made in order to better our lives.

Stress & depression can effect the body in numerous ways – but we have our faith as a line of defense, something to hold us together in times of need. it’s beautiful to feel it piece together & to feel clarity within a difficult time.

I hope this helps you guys out there, the same way it’s helped me.

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My battles,

So here I am, about to get real personal with you.

As deep as it gets, well just about.

Vitiligo is a skin thing. A disease is what the doctors call it. Causing the loss of skin pigmentation. You lose your skin color. Covering your body at an unpredictable extent and rate, the cells that produce your skin pigmentation either die or stop doing what they should.

Well, I have it.

In my opinion to be a woman with Vitiligo is to lose [quite a bit of] confidence, to question your beauty continuously, your worth in societal views, but also to learn to appreciate the control and permanence that life allots you.  

It gives a whole new meaning to being comfortable in one’s own skin.

I believe Mary Pipher explains it best here, “Something dramatic happens to girls in early adolescence. Just as planes and ships disappear mysteriously into the Bermuda Triangle, so do the selves of girls go down in groves.”

The relationship with our body is the most intimate we’ll ever have. It’s the headquarters for our fears and anxieties, because of this it’s where most of our issues stem from.

 Throughout our life we yearn to connect, to belong. We learn how to obtain this feeling and when we do, we feel somewhat accomplished, it feels right.  The security of ourselves and those around us, becomes a safe haven.

Comfort is explained as the easing or alleviation of a person’s feelings of grief or distress. The questioning of any of those “safety nets” can cause a person to lose trust or comfort in even the most basic faculties of life.

And to anyone that has ever felt the loss of comfort or the loss of their foundation, I commend you on working your way back up. As an individual that is continuously working on her confidence and to stand on her own, I know how difficult that may be.

Vitiligo is my battle.

My continual battle with my body, mind and to be quite honest my trust within the world. I hope that all of you out there fighting your own battles feel the need to push forward every day, as I do my best to do.

Just know, I’m here for you as I hope all of you are for me.